The chicken ... or the eggs

I took out a loan last week. You see, Ginny wanted to buy a dozen eggs.

I’m kidding, of course. We put them on a credit card.

Actually, she went to the grocery store recently and found only half-dozens in the egg cooler. So she wound up getting a dozen eggs from our nephew, Eric, who has his own layers. He informed her that he may have to increase his prices if the cost of chicken feed goes up.

So what’s an egg lover to do?

That’s what I’m here for. Well, let’s not forget the Hub’s extensive research team, AKA the internet.

So why are egg prices north of $6 a dozen? It’s the bird flu, or avian influenza if you prefer. To prevent the further spread of the disease, a chicken farmer has to destroy his entire flock if just one bird gets sick.

It’s the old supply-and-demand principle. When supplies go down, prices go up. Ergo, when there are fewer layers, Waffle House places a surcharge on eggs.

Back during the Gold Rush of 1849, San Francisco saw an influx of miners but not enough supplies. A dozen eggs might cost the equivalent of today’s $90. Talk about price gouging.

So, with the price of eggs so high, we have choices. We can swear off our love of henfruit. How about a breakfast of grits, bacon and toast?

Or, we can choose egg substitutes. A website called Pioneer Woman lists “13 Smart Egg Substitutes Already in Your Pantry.” 

Here are Pioneer Woman’s alternatives, which you should consider as recipe ingredients rather than sunny-side up options.

•Aquafaba: “The magical ingredient known as aquafaba is simply the liquid from canned chickpeas.” You got some chickpeas in your cupboard?

•Vinegar and baking soda: It’s more of a leavening agent for baked goods.

•Liquid egg substitute: I don’t even know what that is.

•Powdered egg replacer: Just add water and, well, what’s next?

•Flax seeds and warm water: Doesn’t sound at all like eggs to me.

•Vegetable oil, baking powder and water: And that makes eggs?

•Applesauce: Egg replacement as an ingredient. Sounds like a yoke to me.

•Mashed banana: Add peanut butter but nothing like eggs.

•Chia seed and water: Like we have chia seeds in our kitchen.

•Arrowroot powder and water: Arrowroot is not even in my vocabulary.

•Soy protein powder and water: Didn’t know eggs grew on plants.

•Yogurt: I love yogurt. I love eggs. But they’re entirely different!

•Silken tofu: Silk is a fabric, right?

OK, so egg substitutes are a non-starter. That leaves the real thing. If you can collect enough eggs (and I don’t mean robbing from hens), there are ways to preserve them. 

The Illinois Farmer of Dec. 1, 1861, provides three cheap and easy ways to preserve eggs. 

“Pack the eggs in an upright earthen vessel or tub, with their small ends down. Melt and strain a quantity of cheap tallow or lard, and pour, while warm, not hot, over the eggs in the jar till they are completely covered.

“Pack the eggs in common salt, with small ends down, and they will keep tolerably good for eight or nine months.”

And this: “It has been stated by Reaumer, who is high authoritv, that clear and unfertile eggs will keep good longer than those that would be productive; but it is doubtful whether the difference is so great as to make it justifiable keeping the hens in a meloncholy widowhood on this account.”

In other words, the hens gotta have their rooster.

So there are your options. You can try to use substitutes for eggs, none of which seems like an ovary option to me. 

Or, if you have a collection of eggs, you can try to preserve them. Sounds like too much trouble to me.

Which leaves the final choice: Pay the price, no matter how high it goes.

Or, you can just eat the chicken. 

Larry Penkava is a writer for Randolph Hub. Contact: 336-302-2189, larrypenkava@gmail.com.